Reclaiming Your Power in the Workplace: It’s Not Me, It’s You

Have you ever found yourself staring at your to-do list, feeling overwhelmed by even the simplest tasks? Maybe you find yourself procrastinating, struggling to start, or feeling unmotivated no matter how hard you try. I’ve been there too. It’s like a silent shift happens—you’re not even sure when or why, but everything starts to feel harder than it used to. That spark of energy and drive? It’s dimmed, leaving you stuck in a loop of self-doubt.

Let’s pause here and acknowledge something important: if you’re feeling stuck, diminished, or questioning your abilities, it’s not because you’re lacking. It’s because the environments we navigate are often designed to test, limit, and control our confidence. And the good news? Once you see these hidden forces for what they are, you can take steps to break free and reclaim your power.

Why We Feel Stuck

Corporate culture often rewards compliance. It thrives on hierarchies, rigid expectations, and unspoken rules. Advocacy and self-promotion? They’re rarely encouraged. Over time, subtle signals—like being interrupted in meetings, having your ideas overlooked, or seeing others take credit for your work—erode your confidence.

Without realising it, you might stop speaking up, second-guess your decisions, and even believe the voice in your head whispering, Maybe I’m not good enough.

My Turning Point

When I first heard the phrase, “You are the captain of your own ship,” it hit me hard, because I didn’t feel like the captain of anything.

I was letting others steer my career, my confidence, and even my sense of self-worth. I was quietly going along with the current, too afraid to disrupt the waters. Meetings I once navigated with confidence now felt like battles I wasn’t equipped to fight. I’d lost sight of my strengths and blamed myself for not “measuring up.”

Then something shifted. That phrase wasn’t just a motivational tagline, it became a turning point. I realised how much power I had given away, relying on others to define my worth and undervaluing my own capabilities.

It dawned on me: I’m a big, grown-ass adult. I’m in charge.

This mindset shift wasn’t about becoming fearless, it was about taking responsibility for the one thing I could control: myself. I stopped seeking validation from others and started focusing on what I knew I could do, where I wanted to go, and what I needed to thrive.

That realisation didn’t just empower me, it became the foundation for my journey forward. And it’s why I’m passionate about helping others recognise when they’ve given away control and how to take it back.

Hidden Forces of Self Doubt

If you’re feeling stuck, it’s not just you. Here’s what might be working against you:

Subtle but Pervasive Bias

Assertiveness in men is often praised, while in women, it’s labeled as difficult or aggressive. Over time, this double standard creates a cycle of self-doubt, making you second-guess their actions.

Imposter Syndrome

That persistent feeling of being a fraud? It’s magnified in environments where women are underrepresented. While it’s common, it doesn’t reflect your actual abilities—it reflects the isolating nature of these spaces.

Social Conditioning

From a young age, many women are taught to be accommodating and agreeable, which can clash with the assertiveness required in professional spaces. This subtle conditioning can make you hesitate to self-promote, ask for what you need, or take risks.

Recognising the Cost of Losing Your Power

The erosion of confidence doesn’t just impact your work—it affects your entire sense of self. Many women describe feeling stuck, questioning their value, and believing that perhaps they’re not capable of more. Over time, this mindset leads to disengagement and a withdrawal from leadership opportunities, perpetuating the “leaky pipeline” in the workforce.

But here’s the truth: these feelings are not a reflection of your abilities. They’re a product of a system that wasn’t designed for you to thrive. The good news? You can reclaim your power.

Reclaiming Your Power: Steps to Take

1. Awareness: Spot the Pattern

Reflect on moments where you hold back—whether it’s avoiding tasks, staying silent in meetings, or hesitating to share your achievements.
Use tools like the Workplace Confidence Checklist to identify areas where external factors may be eroding your confidence.

2. Set Boundaries and Intentions

Practice saying “no” to tasks or roles that don’t align with your strengths or goals. Offer alternative solutions that showcase your expertise.
Set clear expectations, espeically with a growing workload. State what you are prioriting and what is depriorited as a result.

3. Celebrate Your Wins

Keep a running list of accomplishments, no matter how small, to remind yourself of your progress and value.
Find a buddy to share your successes and be each others cheer squad.

3. Reframe the Narrative

Focus on showing up authentically. Confidence isn’t about being perfect, it’s about owning who you are and what you bring to the table.
Recognize that our “cave brains” are wired for survival through fitting in, but in today’s world of desks and laptops, this instinct no longer serves us the same way.

Imagine the Possibilities

When you reclaim your power, you stop operating from a place of fear or self-doubt and start moving forward with clarity and purpose. You have the power to make decisions, make changes that serve you the most.

Whether it’s dusting off the CV, going for that promotion, shifting into a new field that lights you up, or simply feeling fulfilled in your current role, the throught of the possibilites become liberating.

Are You Ready to Reclaim Your Power?

If you’re ready to reclaim your power and rewrite your story, start with the Workplace Confidence Checklist. It’s a simple, actionable tool to help you pinpoint what’s holding you back and take steps to overcome it.

Want to dive deeper? The Reclaim Your Power Program is here for you. In just 12 weeks, we’ll address the systemic barriers holding you back, rebuild your confidence, and create a roadmap to the career and life you deserve.

This isn’t about fixing you—it’s about recognising the system and taking actionable steps to reclaim what’s always been yours.

It’s not me, it’s you. Now is the time to reclaim your power and unlock the possibilities that await.

xx Kim

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